Funny Nursing Jokes Page Three
A
little 8 year old boy wanted to be
circumcised when he realized he looked different than dad and his
friends. The
day after the proceedure he returned to school.
During class,
he became uncomfortable
and asked for permission to go to the nurse. When he arrived at her
office, he
hesitated and finally just asked if he could call his mother. Sensing
this was
personal, the nurse stepped into the hall and closed the door to allow
him
privacy.
Several minutes
later the little boy
came out of her office and the nurse noticed his penis was sticking out
of his
pants. "Where are you going?" she asked. "Back to class,"
said the boy.
"But you can't
go back like
that!" explained the nurse. "I have to," stressed the boy.
"My mother said that if I could just stick it out until lunchtime, she
would come and pick me up"
* * * * *
A
nursing assistant, floor nurse, and charge
nurse from a small nursing home were taking a lunch break in the break
room. In
walks a lady dressed in silk scarfs and wearing large polished stoned
jewlery.
"I am 'Gina the
Great',"
stated the lady. "I am so pleased with the way you have taken care of
my
aunt that I will now grant the next three wishes!" With a wave of her
hand
and a puff of smoke, the room was filled with flowers, fruit and
bottles of
drink, proving that she did have the power to grant wishes before any
of the
nurses could think otherwise.
The nurses
quickly aurgued among
themselves as to which one would ask for the first wish. Speaking up,
the
nursing assistant wished first.
"I wish I were
on a tropical
island beach, with single, well-built men feeding me fruit and tending
to my
every need." With a puff of smoke, the nursing assistant was gone.
The floor nurse
went next."I wish
I were rich and retired and spending my days in my own warm cabin at a
ski
resort with well groomed men feeding me coccoa and doughnuts." With a
puff
of smoke, she too was gone.
"Now, what is
the last
wish?" asked the lady.
The charge
nurse said," I want
those two back on the floor at the end of the lunch break."
* * * * *
A hospital
posted a notice in the nurse's lounge saying: "Remember,
the first five minutes of a human being's life are the most dangerous."
Underneath, a nurse had written: "The last five are pretty risky,
too."
* * * * *
The famous
female Olympic skier, Picabo Street (pronounced
Peek-A-Boo), is not just an outstanding athlete, she is also a nurse.
She
currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan
hospital.
She is not
permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused
simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say,
"Picabo, ICU."
* * * * *
The nurse who
can smile when things go wrong is
probably going off duty.
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